Tuesday, November 25, 2008

If I could do it over

Thinking about becoming a parent of a child who will grow and develop to be an individual has got me thinking about my life growing up and how I acted toward some people while learning who I was. It made me think about some things I would change and also some things I hope to teach my kids based on this experience so they might possibly be a better person than I was.

If I could go back in time to Elementary I would have:

-Talked to my parents more about the struggles I had with my 5th grade teacher. This would have helped me to be less shy and feel a lot less stupid growing up.
-Made more friends and not thought I wasn’t cool enough to be friends with certain people.
-Spent more time with my siblings, especially my brother Robert because you never know what’s going to happen tomorrow.
-Played outside more.

If I could go back to Junior High I would have:
-Been a LOT nicer to my parents. When I was younger and my parents were trying to teach me things I didn’t realize that they loved me before I was born like I love my little fetus. I didn’t get that they had the best hopes for me. I didn’t get that children are the world to their parents. I hope that in some way I can get through to my kids and teach them this early on so they don’t hate me for things or think I’m not as cool as their friends. I think I would just be heart broken in they said, “I hate you” and slammed the door. Maybe this is something kids have to go through but I hope maybe if I teach them from the beginning that Brandt and I love them SO much and want them best for them they’ll be a little less rebellious. (My mom’s probably laughing right now and thinking, “yeah, good luck.”)
-Been a lot nicer to my teachers in school and church. Why is it that kids think adults are so stupid? They’re not, really, in fact kids are the “stupid” ones most of the time. Kids think they have to act out so their friends think they’re “cool” when in reality, everyone will be an adult one day and realize they were actually just really rude and hurtful.
-Chosen better friends. I had good friends, bad example friends and friends that just hurt me. I hope I can teach my kids the difference and save them a lot of grief.

If I could go back to High School I would have:

-Used a straightener. Man, I would have used a straightener.
-Spent my money on better and less things. I never really blew my money but wish I’d done more with it.
-Played sports. This would have been difficult because I have asthma but maybe I could have grown out of it.
-Focused more in Seminary.
-Been nicer to my siblings. I wish I'd done more with my younger brothers since I hardly know them because I left for college when they were young.
-Gone on dates. I know this has to do with the fact that I had braces and didn’t use a straightener but I wish I’d gone on some dates.
-Done more with summer vacations.

If I could go back to College I would have:
-Taken my time with it instead of rushing through in a little over 3 years.
-Gone on trips during my off semester, which didn’t exist.
-Been kinder and more loving to my roommates.
-Spent more time with my sisters (if that’s possible).
-Gone home more.

I hope I’m a good mom. I know even the best of people mess up and get frustrated but I hope when my kids grow up they have less regrets than I do and they think I did a good job as a parent like I think my parents did.


the fellers said...

oh you will be such a great mom! I know it....you are such a great person, and we all have the craziest regrets....but you know what, I think those regrets are important, because we learn from them, and become better people because of them....dont be too hard on yourself, now you will be able to teach your kids the lessons that you learned! I cant wait for all your fun stories when you are a mom, you are so funny! Are you going going to be in Utah for Christmas? I hope you have a Happy Thanksgiving!

kathy said...

hahaha, used a straightener...you make me laugh, brinkses.